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The Ever-Illusive Peace

The Ever-Illusive Peace
Trying to choose a positive reality

Friday, August 17, 2007

Another fellow infertile discovered!

And she is my current boss. There are many reasons that I am hoping that they offer me a permanent position. This is now near the top of the list.

My current boss, let's call her Jewel, is, by my calculations, in her late 40s. Her daughter is nearly 6. I had my suspicions.

I have had to leave work for two appointments since I started a little over 2 weeks ago. She was great about them even though I never gave her specifics and possibly (although didn't) threaten to miss really important client crises.

Jewel is on vacation this week but was kind enough to say that she hoped my doctor's appointment went well in an email about what I am working on right now. I confessed that a medical problem is turning out to be more complicated than originally hoped and that more questions keep getting raised.

She chcked in again about it - saying that she hoped I got better feedback from my doctor - so I summed up the situation in an email. No specifics, only that we are trying to solve the mystery of infertility, that there may be a problem with one part of my reproductive system, etc.

She emailed me back to say that she has been through it as well. And that she would be happy to talk about it over lunch at some point.

I literally welled up.

We have emailed back and forth a couple of times since, with her pointing out that her daughter is worth it and to keep that in mind as I go through this.

God, it is *nice* to be understood.

Jewel is a very nice person. She's a demanding boss, and a bit on the unpatient side, with lots of frantic directives. But she thanks me for everything I do. And she clearly likes me as a person as well. We even have started to joke around and laugh together.

What makes me feel so lucky is that I have a good feeling about Mr. Flowers, the person who would be my boss for the federal job. I am confident that he would be understanding and caring as well based on the conversations we have had (nothing specific to IF but about life and family in general.) At least I know that I have a good chance of ending up in a caring working environment. Working for people who recognize that life has to fit into work and vice-versa.

Of course, if I don't end up working for either of those people permanently I will be devastated. But I will try not to think that way.

Instead, I choose to simply be excited that I have found a fellow infertile!

12 comments:

AwkwardMoments said...

On Sweet- Its nice to have someone "incharge at your work" to be understanding to the timely mannor our dr's appointments are

E. Phantzi said...

Cool! Always nice to get some empathy and understanding esp. when you know they really get it.

megan said...

it's always nice to know someone who can identify what you're going through. i'm glad you found her!

Anonymous said...

I wish my boss got it.

I hope she provides inspiration for you. It will all be worth it in the end.

Natalie said...

Wow, that is really great to have discovered that bond of similarity and to have your boss understand your situation... that's so fabulous!

Beth said...

HOw cool is that, that your boss was infertile also. That will be a GREAT support system. I am so glad that you have someone in your life, and office, that knows what you are going through.

Becks said...

Oh that's great, I too have a really understanding boss and it makes such a difference. It must be such a weight lifted to think you can sort your IF stuff without feeling pressure from work.

I hope the follow up talk on the 4th, gives you a plan.

Mama Bear said...

So wonderful to find a fellow infertile irl...and a boss, nonetheless. Very comforting...

Kristen said...

My boss also has been through IF so it is such a relief to not have to worry about taking time off for appts and procedures and such. I was so worried before we had "the conversation".

I will be crossing my fingers they can make things permanent.

Jen said...

That would be so wonderful to have a boss who has been there! I'm glad you found her!

Sarah said...

that's great, those connections mean so much. good luck with the job.

One View said...

I think that is so great. My boss also suffered from IF and his wife went through many failed fertility treatments. So he was so understanding and so great with my situation.. !